My Birthday Tomorrow

in case you ain't know, my birthday tomorrow...

Jul 09, 2025

For reference below:

Last year this time, I wasn’t feeling it. I was grateful for another trip around the sun, but I was ready for July 11th—the day after my birthday, and a day when everything felt normal again. I can’t put my finger on it, but last year, the birthday spirit was not in the air, much like how Christmas is now.

This year, though, I am feeling optimistic about tomorrow. So far, since the last birthday, I accomplished a few goals, dived deeper into my spirituality, and released bags of trauma I’d been carrying for years. Although a few things are different in my life at this moment, I am happy. I reflect on the times when I wasn’t able to say that, and it was because I needed other people or things to make me happy.

Do you ever have a fucked up mood when bills are due? Or when the expenses exceed the income? When that one person you want to call you hasn’t responded, or when that goal you’ve been trying to accomplish for months has not been reached?

I could share a list of things that used to steal my joy, but as I’ve grown, I’ve learned that nothing has ever stolen my joy, I handed that shit right over.

I handed it to people who care much less about me than I do about them.

I handed it over to jobs that I allowed to take advantage of my expertise/skills.

And I for sure handed it over to a society that I thought I desired validation from.

My happiness has always been my responsibility. It is something I can access at any time, carry with me wherever I travel, and freely exude regardless of the circumstances. This year has taught me how to be independent in my happiness. It removed the co-dependency I had for others to provide it for me.

The more we feel at home in our bodies and take up space from crown to heel, we understand that it is home. A beautiful house on a hill, with spacious areas, marble floors, and high ceilings. Imagine the most beautiful, cozy property you could dream up, and start viewing your internal world as such. We are both the decorator and the trash man. We are both the gardener and the tenant.

This year, I choose to create and decorate new spaces in my world. Allowing myself to show up even more authentically, more loved, more cared for, more radiant.